The Funny/LOL Thread

I almost disliked this because now that blasted song is stuck in my head.....

 

Ha ha mea culpa!

 

"Sir! Can I go to the toilet?"

"I don't know. If you can't, see your doctor."

 

(this joke proudly told to me by a 4 year old child)

Patient: "Doctor, I hurt in 3 places."

Doctor: "Don't go those 3 places."

 

Patient pokes himself. "Doctor, it hurts when I do this."

Doctor: "Don't do it, then!"

==================================

Patient pokes himself in numerous places, "Doctor, it hurts if I do this here... here... here... here... here. What do you think is wrong?"

Doctor: "You have a broken finger."

 

(Newfie jokes--jokes about citizens of Newfoundland--are Canada's answer to Polish jokes. The spirit of these jokes is gentle ribbing of out-there countrymen)

A Newfie visits the doctor. "Doc, every time I drink a cup of tea I get a bad pain in my nose."

The doctor replied, "Take the spoon out of the cup before drinking."

 

"Doctor Doctor I was playing the harmonica & I swallowed it"

"Thank goodness you weren't playing the piano"

 

How do I know this photo is bullshit? What’s holding his sunglasses on?!